by Glyn Meek
It would seem that the popularity of Facebook is actually a precursor to the ending of the world...
While I was doing some research on this particular topic, I thought I would put away my initial bias and so I Googled 'social networking on a computer'. Obviously, I came up with the usual 3,405,678 irrelevant results, but the first item that appeared was a WikiDictionary page. I opened it, and all I found was the word 'oxymoron'. I was delighted that my initial bias was living up to its customary curmudgeonly accuracy and that the all-powerful World Wide Web had confirmed said bias.
Now, strengthened with this questionable confirmation of my cynical first impression, I rushed forward in my investigations. With some embarrassment, given the upcoming tone of this particular article, I have to admit that I have been a LinkedIn member (www.linkedin.com ) for some years now. However, to assuage that embarrassment with an appropriate excuse, I don't think LinkedIn should be considered a 'social' networking site. Rather, it should be considered for what it is, a 'business' networking site, and with that dismissive statement, let me clamber back onto the lofty, Geezer Geek pedestal. From way up here, clutching my moral scepter, let us now take a look at the main protagonist... Facebook.
I saw a while ago that even the Queen of England now has an 'official' Facebook page! What is she going to show, "me and Phil with the grandkids at Buck House?" or "Snapshots of Christmas at Balmoral?"
In The Book of Revelations Chapter 23, verses 12-13, is written the following...
12 And it came to pass that the eighth and final sign was the Queen sending forth her messengers to the people with all manner of tidings.
13 Many rent their garments and tore their hair at this sign of evil that the common people should know their rulers in such detail, and a plague was upon the land.
So, there you have it, the beginning of the end, and we are the privileged generation that gets to watch it all unfold. I will admit that my early perception of Facebook was a positive one as I naively envisaged a photographic repository for families to easily share their memories, but what happened then? Firstly, what was wrong with just emailing the appropriate imagery to a list of 'uncle-and-aunt' recipients without cluttering up the airwaves and storage media for the rest of us?
Secondly, all of a sudden, we can now connect to complete strangers with the click of an 'Add as Friend' button and instantly become bosom buddies. What happened to meeting and greeting, sitting over a beer and learning about a person, sharing moments with someone and finally realizing that there was a connection that mattered? It has been said that people have perhaps 5 real friends in life, and then hundreds of acquaintances of varying depth, but now we instantly have 'friends' all over the world. My wife gets asked every day by dozens of complete strangers to be their friend, and she just likes playing the 'numbers' game to see how many she can get. Right now, she has 4,657 'friends', 3 of whom she has actually met.
And then, most ludicrous of all, there are the messages that can be posted to our so-called 'friends'. From a number of the posts that I have seen over my wife's shoulder as she obsessively looks to see how many 'new friends' she has today, I can see that the demise of the American way of life is finally upon us. Idiot-teenagers (redundant) think that people (i.e. obscure 'friends') actually care that they are "Going to the mall right now." Serious people during the day think that at night, everyone wants to know that they are "Just about to eat dinner. Corn beef hash tonight, yummy." Intelligent individuals destroy their once-assumed credibility with "watching Glee tonight, yippee."
Why is this happening?
Why do thousands of previously sane and social individuals now eschew going out and meeting REAL people and making REAL friends, in favor of sitting at home, night after night for hours at a time, staring at a computer screen and typing rubbish to people who don't matter and don't care? I have not done any studies, but would be interested to find out how bar and restaurant sales have suffered over the last few years as take-out food revenues have soared. I have heard of the odd 5-year-old child who has an imaginary friend that they play with, but surely anyone with any sense wants REAL social interactions with REAL people.
Also, what's with the 'Thumbs up' symbol on Facebook? I suppose this is for the completely brain-dead idiot (i.e. teenager) who cannot even think up their own trivial "going to watch my friend work out" comment, but are reduced to picking their nose and merely agreeing with the meaningless drivel of someone else...'me too' would seem more appropriate than 'Thumbs up'.
Have we as a species really come to the beginning-of-the-end as predicted in The Book of Revelations? I think we have at least come to the beginning-of-the-end of TRUE 'social networking'.
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